Kickass Cupcakes

I’ve said before that I’ve become very disillusioned with the cupcake industry, lately. They’re just not stepping it up for their customers who have a refined palette for miniature pastries. A couple weeks ago I had a particularly bad cupcake and had sworn off them (I had another a few days ago but it was free so of course I ate it. I don’t think I’m better than everybody or something).

For graduation I got cupcakes from Kickass Cupcakes in Somerville, which I had really high hopes for. For one thing, they are pretty hyped up in Boston, and secondly, they have an abundance of cocktail inspired cupcakes and when someone tries to incorporate alcohol into any kind of food, I’m generally on board.

The frosting was really good, but the cake was the driest I’ve ever had. Seriously, how hard is it to make a moist cupcake?! Boxed cake mixes can keep it together, and my mom’s scratch cupcakes are consistently nailing it. It wasn’t just some of them, either. It was all of them and we got about 15 different flavors. I’d be willing to give them another shot, but I’m still just very upset about the whole ordeal.

Gourmet Donuts

I will always have a great love for cupcakes, but I feel like their novelty is starting to die out a little (that was so hard to type, but alas, I feel it’s true).

I’ve been hearing that pie is becoming the new cupcake. This is ludicrous, my friends. I’m just going to go ahead and say it, who ever is trying to push this trend is flat out irresponsible. Pie has virtually none of the qualities a trendy pastry should have: it’s not travel friendly- to eat pie your only option is to eat it on a plate with a fork, which makes it really difficult to pop into a shop, buy your pastry and eat on the go. Instead you have to sit down and slowly eat your pie giving you plenty of time to think and steep in your own shame. Sorry, mini pies are not the answer! The filling, people! That’s gonna get all over you- you need a plate! Also, the kitschy decorating options for pie is severely limited.

Instead, I give you a better option.

The following is partially a prediction, but also a plea to the American public to help me make this the new cupcake: Gourmet Donuts. Just look at these pictures and tell me you would rather have a slice of pie.

From Sublime Donuts in Atlanta

Sublime: Caramel Apple Fritter, Red Velvet, Dulce de Leche, Wild Berry Fritter

There are few places right now that offer gourmet donuts- these pictures are from Sublime in Atlanta, Georgia. Another is Voodoo Donuts in Portland, Oregon. I have to keep telling myself that an entire vacation to one of these places for the sole purpose of donuts is fiscally irresponsible, which is why I beg everyone with the inkling to open another cupcake shop to reconsider and make some elaborate donuts instead.