LA Preparations

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Now that it’s March 1st, the countdown really begins for my road trip to LA. There’s so much to do in order to get ready for a move, particularly one that involves driving across the country, so I’m trying to be really organized and keep my priorities in order. I’ve accomplished some important things so far, like:

1. Lost 2 pounds. I’m trying to subsist on a diet comprised of primarily kale and alcohol, so I’m prepared when I actually get to LA. My goal is that by the time I get there, I’m able to complete a Soul Cycle class on just a belly full of vodka and Pressed Juicery.

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2. Bought a really cute floppy brimmed straw hat because I needed it because the sun! And I’m on a never ending pursuit of being a hat person.

3. Went back to the orthodontist to get a removable retainer for my bottom teeth because last year I had my permanent retainer taken out. My teeth shifted, and every time I looked in the mirror at my janky teeth, I was overcome with the anxiety that if I was ever in a movie, people would see my crazy crooked bottom teeth while I was talking during a close up. Now I just have to wear this retainer 24 hours a day. If you’ve figured out that when I’m writing about how I’m a loser who drinks wine by herself while I watch SVU, I’m really scraping the bottom of the comedy barrel. But now I’m 24 with a retainer that gives me a lisp, so I’m somehow an 11 year old nerd and 45 year old divorcee, both with no life. A whole new set of things to talk about!

4. Took all my shorts out of my bureau and onto the floor so I’ll know where they are when I have to pack up the car.

5. Bought a Clinique daily wrinkle cream with SPF 25 to wear during the road trip.

The important things are pretty much out of the way, I just need to get my hair done and buy make up while I’m still in tax free NH. Still no job or place to live, but I’m pretty confident that if I hang around West Hollywood in my new hat someone will just approach me with a job offer or something.

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7 thoughts on “LA Preparations

  1. Good luck on your adventure! Sounds like you’ve got your priorities in line. Clinique moisturizer will definitely make you glow. In Holloywood you have to aim for looking like your at least 10 years younger than you are. So aim for 13?

  2. I learned all my social graces from the seriously under-appreciated movie, “Swingers.” The trick is, “look like you don’t need the shit and they give you the shit for free.”

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